What I Wish I Knew About Age and Infertility When I was 30+ and IVF was Failing

“Taking a 3 to 6 month break to improve egg quality is largely based on misconceptions.” Real quote. From a real doc. On the internet.

Wait, hold up… so you’re telling me…

Don’t delay treatment! Because good eggs go bad that quick, but there’s no real chance of improvement?

And you’re saying only “bad” eggs came & went for years… 27, 28, 29, 30 … Then a failed IVF, lots of bad eggs collected … “Poor egg quality & there’s nothing you can do.” Said The Experts™

Then. Changes.

Honestly? From pure desperation.

31.Second IVF: 5 “good” eggs, The Experts™ said. But it didn’t work: that IVF failed.

More changes & a root cause. High NK Cells. Again The Experts™ laughing because I told them my hypothesis between autoimmune, gut health & fertility. But that’s not real science (actually told to me by a doctor) just use immune suppressing drugs.

I did both holistic & medications … 32, 33, 34, 35 …. 3 EFTS:

1. Miscarriage.

2. IVF baby.

3. Miscarried the twins.

Then two months later at 36, after healing my gut for year+ (because that’s the root cause of too many issues, especially autoimmune ones) & boost whole body cellular health 🤷🏽‍♀️ a Natural Pregnancy.

My 27-31 year old eggs WERE BAD. So by The Experts™ “science” my 32/36 year old eggs should have been worse? So why the very obvious improvement, despite age?

Or was it just that for 8 years, that good egg, the one that became the natural pregnancy at the age of 36, was… I guess, just chillin’? Straight-up sitting in line at the ovarian DMV like, Oh hey ladies, you go ahead. I’m waiting till she’s 36 even though The Experts™ said & I quote…

“Delaying treatment in the hopes that a ‘good egg’ will appear or that ‘egg quality’ will improve could mean missed opportunities. For many, time is a crucial factor in fertility treatment success.”

Make. It. Make. Sense.

The Experts™ love quoting 80s-level junk science. Especially those working in the billion dollar fertility industry. Some even claim that it’s the IVF that “fix” fertility, when someone spontaneously gets pregnant after IVF treatment. I would love to see the scientific evidence on that one. Talk about crazy nano technology that is being used without anyone’s consent.

We’ve been sold the idea that egg quality is mostly about age. That your eggs are basically avocado toast going brown the second you hit 19. (Spoiler: They’re not.)

Here’s the truth:

Your eggs are the biggest cells in your body & no they don’t live in some mythical box that somehow is only affected by your age.

Sometimes you don’t need science when you just have common sense.

They’re not dying off like characters in a bad rom-com. They are being continuously shaped by your entire internal environment.

That 1 good egg? Or maybe 2 or 3 after more years of supposedly declining because they didn’t pop out during treatment. That didn’t just happen & it isn’t just luck.

It finally had the right conditions to mature and thrive. Alongside all the other essential systems needed for a healthy pregnancy.

The irony is wild. The same Experts™ who dismiss basics as “unproven” helped create us—first patients, handing them our money & dreams, now debunking them by default because their lack of growth made us figure it out ourselves.

I know I had no intention of becoming highly knowledgeable on how fertility is shaped by the endocrine system, gut health, mitochondrial energy, subconscious beliefs, nervous system regulation, hormonal signaling, trauma stored in the body, environmental toxins, inflammation, nutrient depletion & so much more.

But their refusal to apply emerging science and basic common sense forced me to start studying what they refused to.

I work with women every day whose fertility worsened after rushing into treatment,

because medical treatment compounded on top of their already fried nervous system, depleted cellular health & cracking emotional safety.

Let me be clear.

Yes, age plays a role. But mainly because you’ve had longer to wreak havoc on your cellular health.

Yes, menopause is inevitable.

‼️But age is NOT the number one factor in fertility.

✅Whole Body Cellular Health is.

And that’s something you can work on.

When you’re supported at the root.

Not shoved into fast-track protocols that ignore the big picture. Or handed a supplement stack & a prayer.

It’s not that your body isn’t working.

It’s that it’s protecting you.

Because at a cellular level, it doesn’t feel safe to create.

It doesn’t have the energy to thrive.

Cells run on energy, including your eggs.

And mitochondrial function, the energy engine of your cells, is one of the most critical factors in egg quality.

Again you don’t need to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars & 10 years in medical school in the year 2025 to have basic knowledge of cellular health. It kills me that The Experts™ refuse to see this.

But sure, let’s keep pushing the narrative that pausing to heal is wasted time.

While funneling people straight into a treatment pipeline designed for volume, not vitality.

And here’s the kicker, something no one wants to talk about. You, The Experts™ who are sworn by oath to do no harm, are putting the next generation at higher health risks because you’re damaging genetics by pushing the body to do something that it’s clearly telling you it’s incapable of doing before some TLC.

The Experts™ actually got one thing right:

“Egg quality isn’t easily modified by short-term lifestyle changes, supplements, or other interventions.”

Yes! It’s not a quick fix, but it can be done. Here’s the truth: Your body needs to come out of full-blown inflammatory chaos that contributed to the low quality in the first place, which takes 3 to 9+ months depending on many factors and your ability to surrender and get into coherence…

Then it takes another three months for a follicle to mature into an egg with the nutrients, mitochondrial energy & hormonal signaling it needs to support conception.

So no, it’s not about quick fixes.

It’s about deep, consistent repair.

You don’t need fixing.

You need healing at the cellular level.

You’re probably not infertile.

You’re dealing with fertility issues.

And when you ditch the fear, drop the pressure & start actually listening to your body! Especially when you feel The Experts™ advice doesn’t add up…

That’s when the magic happens.

That’s when you finally hear the whispers your body’s been trying to scream all along.

Let's Do This Together 💚

Monica

Listen up, lovelies: Everything I share about health, diet, or fertility magic is my opinion. Yep, it’s all based on years of trial and error, study, reading, listening, and side-eyeing the nonsense out there. What worked for me might be a jackpot for you—or it might be a total flop. Bodies are weird like that. 🤷‍♀️

Let’s get one thing straight: I’m not a doctor, nutritionist, dietitian, or any other kind of licensed health wizard. If you need medical advice, run—don’t walk—to an actual qualified professional. Don’t come back here saying Monique told you to eat kale for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, okay?

As for the products I mention, they’re either what I used during my own infertility rollercoaster or what I wish I’d known about back then. No guarantees, no promises, and absolutely no refunds on your hope budget if it doesn’t work out.

Now that we’ve cleared that up, proceed with curiosity and, above all, discernment. You’ve got this. 💪✨

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