How to Stop Outsourcing Your Power and Reclaim Your Fertility Now with Abigail White
You’re exhausted. You’ve done the diets, the yoga, the acupuncture, the supplements that basically turn into very expensive pee. Maybe you’ve been through IVF trauma, and the thought of another transfer has your nervous system screaming. You want answers. You want certainty. And if we’re being brutally honest, you want someone—anyone—to tell you it’s all going to work out.
I get it. I’ve been there. But here’s the thing: the more you outsource your power, the further you drift from the only real solution—yourself.
The Allure of the Magic Eight Ball
When you’re knee-deep in fertility burnout, the idea of a psychic, a coach, or even your RE handing you black-and-white answers feels like oxygen. Am I ready for IVF? Will it work this time? Is my spirit baby waiting for me?
Here’s the hard truth: asking for dates, genders, or guarantees isn’t empowerment. It’s desperation dressed up in spiritual glitter. And it keeps you looping in the chaos comfort zone—searching outside instead of listening inside.
“Stop outsourcing your empowerment; you are the only one who can do the work.”
Radical Honesty vs. Yes People
You don’t need another “yes” person. You need someone who tells you the truth, even when it stings. IVF won’t bypass chronic inflammation. Meditation won’t erase trauma if your nervous system is still wired for survival mode. And no supplement protocol will work if joy is missing from your life.
Yes, joy. That thing you keep postponing until after the baby arrives. Spoiler: Joy is the missing fertility vitamin most of you are deficient in.
Nervous System Reset > Fertility Hustle
Fertility trauma lives in your body like an old VHS tape on repeat—grief, shame, fear, hope, crash, repeat. Until you pause the tape, your nervous system can’t reset. And without regulation, your body is not interested in reproduction. It’s too busy trying to survive your daily control freak spiral.
Healing means showing your system that it’s safe to slow down. Safe to play. Safe to trust. That’s not fluffy wellness talk—it’s biology.
Rewriting Your Story
I’ve watched women told they had “soul contracts not to have kids” completely flip the script because they showed up for themselves. They changed their health. They changed their energy. They stopped waiting for a yes/no answer and started living like they mattered right now—not just when they had a baby in their arms.
And you know what? Even if the baby didn’t come, they gained their lives back. Longer lives. Healthier lives. Joy-filled lives. That’s real empowerment.
“The worst thing isn’t not becoming a mom, it’s losing yourself while trying.”
The Shift That Changes Everything
You are not broken. You are not behind. You don’t need to micromanage the universe for dates and details. What you need is to reconnect to your intuition, regulate your nervous system, and find joy in your actual, present-tense life. That’s the energy that shifts fertility—and heals you, whether motherhood comes tomorrow, next year, or in a way you didn’t expect.
You can’t outsource that work. But you also don’t have to do it alone.
🎧 Press play on this episode if ready for some radical honesty and soul-level empowerment.
👉 [LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE HERE]
Connect with Abigail:
- Website: https://www.breathoflifellc.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/breathoflife_healer/
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Listen up, lovelies: Everything I share about health, diet, or fertility magic is my opinion. Yep, it’s all based on years of trial and error, study, reading, listening, and side-eyeing the nonsense out there. What worked for me might be a jackpot for you—or it might be a total flop. Bodies are weird like that. 🤷♀️
Let’s get one thing straight: I’m not a doctor, nutritionist, dietitian, or any other kind of licensed health wizard. If you need medical advice, run—don’t walk—to an actual qualified professional. Don’t come back here saying Monique told you to eat kale for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, okay?
As for the products I mention, they’re either what I used during my own infertility rollercoaster or what I wish I’d known about back then. No guarantees, no promises, and absolutely no refunds on your hope budget if it doesn’t work out.
Now that we’ve cleared that up, proceed with curiosity and, above all, discernment. You’ve got this. 💪✨
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today
Connect with Monica over on
Youtube || Instagram || TikTok
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:
Apple || Stitcher || Spotify || Google
Full Transcript:
00:00
Hello beautiful and welcome to the Finding Fertility podcast.
00:10
I'm Monica, your mentor in uncovering the hidden layers of your fertility journey. Together, we'll discover the right path for you within the six essential steps to creating the family of your dreams. We'll ditch the overwhelm, tune into your intuition, and build a vibrant foundation for your fertility. Whether it's through gut health, subconscious healing, or energetic alignment, you can unlock your body's natural power to get and stay pregnant.
00:37
Your fertility journey is all about radical responsibility and deeply believing that your body is on your side. It's time to stay consistent, embrace trust, surrender, and create the transformation you deserve. Fighting fertility does not diagnose, prescribe, or treat any fertility issues. What we do is empower you to take control of your health by uncovering the root causes holding you back. Let's do this together.
01:01
Happy Friday, y'all. Welcome back to another episode of Finding Fertility. I'm your host, Monica Cox, and I'm truly honored you are here with me becoming the conscious mama you were born to be. I got my girl Abigail here. If you guys haven't, I'm going to link the podcast Abigail has already been on, especially around spirit babies, because you might want to listen to that one as well for your conscious.
01:27
knowledge of how you're moving through this journey and what you're actually thinking spirit babies might be or all that type of stuff. But what you might not know is I consult with Abigail. So with my one to one clients, Abigail does a distance reading. She trusts me enough. Thank you, Abigail, to get her information.
01:51
and marry it with my information and take the actions for my clients that need to be taken. And obviously, it's all about the client showing up, right? Like we can give them as much knowledge as we possibly physically, mentally, emotionally can. But if you're not showing up and doing the work and onboarding the advice using your discernment, does that fit with me? Does that resonate? Am I ready for that type of thing?
02:21
It's just very, it's like supplements become very expensive pee if you're not lowering your inflammation, right? It's kind of that. So we're having this podcast because I have a client, very short, I don't know, it could be a really long story, but let's start with this. When you did this reading,
02:49
It was the first time you ever mentioned a spirit baby in this read in this reading. All the ones before you had never mentioned it. And that's not what these readings are about. I'm not here to contact spirit babies and get dates or, you know, genders or if you have one near you, that's that's amazing. And it could be really validating. But at the same time.
03:18
It does not have an impact whether or not you're going to have a kid or not. Because at the same time, I, we had that reading, which I'll link the, the, uh, this podcast that we did together about soul contracts. Yes. two clients were at the same time. You said to one of them, man, your spirit baby is there. Like they are like hanging out. The other one, you were like, you have a contract not to have kids. Right.
03:47
So you would think that information would drive the one whose baby seemingly was there to be like, okay, I'm going to show up for myself. And then the other one to be like, fuck that. All right, I guess I'm out. I guess I'm not supposed to have kids. The complete opposite happened with these two clients. we're continually working with the client who was contracted. I tell you, Abigail, and I have chills saying this. The level of commitment.
04:17
for that this woman did to change her contract, to radically change her health, right? Like, I think we went about three months without seeing each other, maybe a little bit more. She showed up on the Zoom and I was like, who the hell are you? Like, she looked completely different because she started not only implementing the stuff that we were doing together, but she sought out another practitioner that was a specialist in liver. She had a really big liver issue, like,
04:47
chronic and she just did absolutely amazing right and her story is not done yet haven't heard the final result, but it doesn't matter at the of the day this woman is going to live 10 20 years longer because of her chronic liver issue. She was going to die. They told her like you got 10 years left, right? So this other client with the reading just fell off the wagon like she just didn't contact me and she would only contact me.
05:16
Even though I was reaching out to her like, hey, let's go, let's go when she was in crisis mode. And I was a different practitioner back then. I've obviously changed over the last two years. And so I thought that was kind of it. At the end of last year, I reached out to everyone who didn't have their sessions and said, hey, these are your sessions. I would love to still honor them with you, but it's kind of time to wrap this up. If you don't want them, fine. But that's going to be done. What? Six months later.
05:46
She reaches out to me and says, I will forego my sessions with you if Abigail does another reading. And she asked what five or six specific questions. Very specific, very specific. It was very specific to her particular fertility journey and the path that she had wanted to take. She asked very specifically about
06:15
about her spirit baby and asked very specifically about gender. She asked very specifically about like birth date. Yeah, it was was quite specific. And obviously as
06:33
coach like me, my heart kind of broke that. Oh, mine definitely did when you sent me the email. Yeah, yeah, I did too. Because what we see is not empowerment. no, it's literally the very opposite of that. When somebody comes to me and is and has gone from
07:01
I want to understand, I want to have a very grand overview and of what's going on with my body. And then, you know, we can like, you know, funnel down that to me tells me, okay, you are understanding that this is more than just a yes or no answer. You understand that there is there are steps that have to be taken. You understand that there is work to be done.
07:30
on multiple levels. You have to peel back the layers of the onion. You got to do the work, whether it be shadow, whether it be physical, whatever it might be. And when you ask those types of questions, that is telling me that there is there's readiness, there is willingness, there is discipline. And even if it's not 100%, it's in process. And that is that is the thing that you need and want on any journey, on any healing journey, on any whatever.
08:01
When you're coming in wanting me to be a magic eight ball, this sort of these sorts, this line of questioning tells me that you are done doing the work you as in you don't you no longer want to do the work. Or think that you don't need to do any other type of work, because one of the questions was about inflammation.
08:26
Should I, am I ready for an IVF transfer? And I get it. Like, fuck, I get it. Like could feel the energy of desperation. And I was there too, right? Like my last frozen embryo transfer, that was it. I had no evidence I could get pregnant naturally. yes, like, know, I like truly, I thought it was gonna happen. Like Beyonce was pregnant with twins. I had like two egg yolks, you know, like I was gonna have twins.
08:55
It was gonna happen and it didn't. And I truly thought that was the end. Like I really did. I didn't have what I have now. And I get the devastation that you think you're so wrapped up in this like journey of like, well, if IVF doesn't work, getting pregnant naturally will never happen. this I've decided right now that this is my last IVF. So therefore, if it doesn't, that's it. It's done. And that's just not true.
09:24
It's really a story you've made up. And so I understand the desperation behind it. so, but where I'm going with is like the inflammation part, that was something that you answered for her. specifically. That was very clear. And that was very clear because in that, in relation to that question,
09:50
you are asking me to look at a physical body that already exists, that has done certain things or not done certain things. And I can see that you're asking me questions about a birth date. Well, there is a lot of things that are up in the air around that question. There are multiple souls that have a choice in that. so to try to come up with a specific answer when the question
10:19
incorporates multiple different choices. That is not possible to give a 100%. Here's your answer. When you are telling me to look at a body and energy and tell you what I see, that is easy. That is easy because there is no choice. There is what is in front of me. Yeah. So, and this was the, this is so,
10:48
Obviously just getting this email broke both of our hearts. knowing that if you're asking, some of the questions were valid, some of them were a little bit like magic eight, Bolly. And if you just want someone to tell you those things, instead of doing the deeper work of like, okay, am I ready? Am I doing this type of thing? I knew that she wasn't following her intuition. I knew she wasn't trusting herself enough to...
11:17
you know, say hey, because she has done a lot of work. Like that's the thing. Like I know she has and I gave her access back into Dreams because anyone who works with me gets access to Dreams and I knew I had just exploded that course with all this new information. So was like, okay, here you go. This is what you want. God, I hope that this will really get you, right? Because that's what I want for the end of these, you know, coaching packages that
11:46
you are just set free and you have everything that you need to really show up for yourself and do the thing. And so we did it. And she wasn't happy, folks. She was not happy. And I will tell you from my perspective why it was just very briefly, like succinctly why she wasn't happy in my world and how I saw it was that she was looking for a guest person.
12:16
And the very true thing about it is that neither Monica or myself are yes people. We are not just going to tell you, yep, no, you're great. You're great. Well done. If we see that you're not great and that it's not well done right now, that now us being honest does not mean that we're not supportive.
12:44
does not mean that we're not recognizing the work already put in. I felt like in my response, was very, I was very aware of that. And I made mention of that, of like, I see what you have done. Don't get me wrong. But you are asking this question and this is the answer. And here is how I see and I'm being told and feeling into this and
13:13
bringing in my knowledge of medicine as well as my intuition, because for all of you who have forgotten, I'm a registered nurse for a decade and have worked with multiple, multiple groups of individuals and specialties. This is not me just randomly pulling some smoke out of my ass and calling it glitter.
13:43
This is me trying to help you get to your goal in the same way that you as their coach are doing the same thing. And so, you know, to be, I get it. It was not the answer that she wanted, but I hope that all now realize after listening to this podcast, if you go into any session with you or with me,
14:12
with this idea that we're that both of us are going to just be like, yay, and lie to you. If that is what you're looking for is for us to just lie to you and give you this like easy out. Forget it. And here's the thing of why I wanted to do this podcast is because I understand the desperation of wanting to know.
14:38
yes, no questions, or even like, hey, have I done good enough? Do you think I should try again? And when you don't hear the answer you want, that's where the radical responsibility comes in. And observing yourself of how you took that information that you asked for in the first place. This is not the first time I've had a client not be happy with your readings. No, it's not.
15:05
And the thing is, is that I always go back to them of like, you asked, you gave us permission, you I can see things too, you asked and we're only relaying of what we can see. And look, here's the other thing, we're humans too. You know, like we are seeing what we're seeing and that's why discernment is so good and make sure that you're ready for any answer, not just the answer you're looking for, because you will set yourself up for a big disappointment.
15:36
Now that doesn't mean we're right or we're wrong. That means we delivered to the best of our abilities of what we see, what we feel using our tools, using our reality as well, helping you. I want people on this journey when they are... I... It's like a hand up, right? Like if this was like a thing... I mean, I know it was a thing 15 years ago, but it just... wasn't a thing. I didn't... Actually...
16:05
After my first failed IVF, a group of friends were going to see like a renowned psychic in York. And they're like, Monica, why don't you come and she can tell you your future about your children. And the reason I didn't go, it wasn't because I didn't believe in it. I just didn't want someone else's opinion. Whether that opinion was correct or not correct, I knew that would creep into my subconscious. And if they didn't, for whatever reason, didn't see
16:34
what I wanted them to see, I knew that would fuck my shit up. So I chose not to engage in that type of thing, not because I didn't believe it, just because it was like, I don't want to take someone else's viewpoint or opinion or gift or skills or whatever it is to impact the way I'm moving through life. And this is what happens.
17:01
And I just wasn't at a place for radical honesty, right? Or where I am now. And what I responded back to this beautiful client is that when I just handed over the reading, because usually when I do one-to-ones, I do a lot of in-depth with your reading. Okay, this is we're going to break this down. Sometimes I word it a little bit nicer.
17:30
As you should. Especially when you tell them it's nine to 12 months, right? I would like, because that's really hard to hear. Like, I know how heartbreaking that is. Just sent the recording and I sent my viewpoint of what I felt was, you know, you're outsourcing your empowerment right now. So even if she just connected with me and say, hey, let's talk this out. This is how I'm feeling.
17:57
She didn't want that. She just wanted someone to look and give her the answers. And specific answers. And I knew that it really didn't matter what I said. It didn't matter what I said. What was needed was that how she took what I said and what she then did with it, whether she loved it or hated it.
18:27
Yeah, and here's the thing, like when I read it and when you came back with, okay, you have high inflammation and it's the hidden inflammation that the radical honesty and the mundane-ness that I'm teaching now that you start to see, right? And you can't see that when you're not practiced in this kind of way of living.
18:51
you think you're perfect when you dial down the diet, you're doing the meditation, you're doing the yoga, you're doing all these things, but you're not seeing the results you want, so what else is going on? It might just be time, right? It might just be time. That's definitely a factor in it, but it's the frequency behind the doing. And that's what she didn't see and didn't understand, is that she was still in that hyper-vigilance, wow, you know, I gotta go. And the big thing, which I love, and I
19:20
know too, right? In my bones, and you said it, I don't think you said it in this reading, it was maybe because we had quite a few go at the same time, is the level of joy and love and just like, fuck, I love my life right now, which, okay, you're not going to love every aspect of your life ever. Like even in motherhood, sorry, I'll throw that one out there. But the level of joy.
19:48
is so freaking low and I remember those times like they were yesterday. I understand them so deeply and it's so freaking simple. It's annoying and it pisses people off and they miss it again and again and again. Do the work. The work is necessary. The deep work is necessary. The diet and all that change. Radical change is necessary in most cases, but I would
20:18
I would wonder your opinion on even if they did the work like 50%, right? They have and just brought that joy and love and self-worth back into their life. think like everything would skyrocket for them, but they just don't see it that way. Especially now, like the thing that I, I, cause you're right. We, I did.
20:45
I think three readings for you at the same time. Like I gave three different clients three different insights. But there was a consistent theme through all three, which I just think is fascinating too. It's the three of them. It's the whole entire fertility community. They're just not enough joy in our lives because we're so hyper focused on having the one thing we think is going to bring the joy, which isn't true.
21:13
There was one thing you said that you hit it right on the nail is that most of the clients coming to me aren't homesteading, homeschool moms who are literally gonna, that's all they're gonna be. Because here's the fucked up fact, right? Like if you're having, I'm gonna put a warning on this podcast. If you're having a Tinder moment, don't listen to this. They're not having fertility issues because they're living in joy. They're doing what they love now. Most of us have.
21:40
that I have to work a 50 hour work week, I have to show up as the perfect, you know, wife and I have to body build and all these things, you're not, you're not showing up in your authentic self. And so that was a hard truth. I mean, this was like the punch in the face that I received after my second son, because I thought I like mastered it with my first, but I was supposed to be Mary Poppins.
22:07
supposed to be the Pinterest mom. I have 20 years of early education. If anyone was going to do it right, I was going to do it right. Did I do it right? Absolutely fucking not. Because I had all the subconscious, all the patterning, all that bullshit that my nervous system, it wasn't safe to be still. It wasn't safe to be present. It wasn't. I had to go. had to be doing something. And it just and and as much as I always wanted to be a mom, I'm going to be homeschooling my boys.
22:36
I know that was my reality in my soul of soul, but my nervous system and my physical world could not allow that until I did the work. I want finding fertility. It lights my soul on fire. I know this is part of my journey too. I'm not that, I'm just not just, like I hate that when people say that because being a stay home mom is not just, there's no just around that.
23:06
But that's not all I want. And I know the women that I'm supporting who are attracted to me don't want that either. They want both. And living in harmony with that, and you pick that up of like these moms, know, soon to be moms think they're gonna and it's just not gonna work that way. Well, and what I found really interesting is that there's this, there's this calling in this pulling in or attraction of women who it's very different now.
23:35
for you. I feel like when I started working with you years ago and doing this work with you, that you were pulling in people who had on some level or were already kind of like on an upward trajectory of bringing in their dreams and goals. Like they, they were working in, something that they love. had a passion project. Did they, or are they, if it wasn't
24:01
If their thing that they loved wasn't their career, it was something that they did for a hobby or something. And so my insights were not about this. I wasn't saying that. I was saying, yeah, here's the things that you need to accomplish and do. And here are the steps. Now, the people who are coming in are people who have been focusing
24:29
on their fertility journey and they have not had any sort of like success at doing the rest of their life and having the rest of their dreams and goals. This is happening now. This wasn't happening then necessarily. Yeah, maybe one or two of them. But now I feel like this is like a horde of individuals who are coming to you who are like,
24:54
I don't have my dream career. I don't have my dream hobbies. I'm not traveling. I'm not doing whatever. And in addition to not doing any of that, I don't have my children. I'm not a mom. I'm not a parent. And so what I ended up saying, I said this, it's so funny. I had the three with you, but then I also had somebody who is also in your world, but she booked with me separately. Like she didn't go through you. And I said this to her very succinctly. And I said to her, because this was her main issue.
25:24
And I said to her, sweetheart, the worst possible thing that could ever happen to you is not that you would not become a mom. It's that you would not become a mom. And in addition to that, you would have spent all of this time heavily focused on the wrong thing, not actually bringing in the joy in your life and bringing in your passions and doing the thing that you love outside of being a mom.
25:54
And now at the end of your life, you don't have a child. You're not a mom and you don't have your dream career. You haven't traveled. You haven't done anything. How shitty is that? That to me is like the worst thing, the absolute worst thing you could get over. And I don't want to say, I don't want to make this sound crass. I don't want to make it be like, it's easy to get over, like not being able to become a mom, but
26:23
One or the other could happen and you could you would survive, right? Like you could become a mom and end up where you ran out of time, quote unquote, even though we know that that's not even a thing. But, you know, feel like you've run out of time and it's you can't you don't have enough time in your life. Here, let me articulate what you're trying to articulate, right? Please. When this journey is done with or without a kid, my ultimate goal.
26:50
for you is to look back and be proud of yourself. Because you will learn when motherhood comes, because I think most people will become mothers because they will show up for themselves in the various ways. But you'll realize that that wasn't the ultimate goal. Correct. You'll realize that your pure joy, your pure essence, living your true source of whatever that is with children was the ultimate goal.
27:19
Now, if it doesn't happen, with the children doesn't happen, you have so much pride and so much love and joy for yourself that that that kind of it doesn't create a huge hole in your heart. There still might be this like, fuck, I just wish. like I have aunties, right, who don't have children because they didn't have the resources we have IVF or the knowledge, whatever it is.
27:48
And especially one on the top of my head that loves her life so much that she got gifted with stepchildren and an abundant of grandchildren. And all of them look at her as grandma. There's like no... And she just like... And it's because she just loves her life. So yeah, like when we talk about fertility stuff, because she, you know, obviously we talked during my journey.
28:17
Like, yeah, like it sucked and it still kind of sucks, but she doesn't look at it like, like with hatred or anger or all that. You gain the tools to, you know, deal with the grief, deal with all that stuff. And like even, even what's crazy, if you're listening to this right now, go Google, I have children and I still deal with infertility. People still talk about and hold on.
28:46
to I'm infertile, I'm broken, all that negative messages, even when they have their children, whether adoption, egg donor, sperm nomer, IVF baby, natural pregnancy. It's because you are able to gain the tools to get rid of the bullshit that creates that narrative, that storyline and all that. That's what you do for yourself on this journey. And with that radical honesty,
29:13
Yes, using guy like I love this shit, right? Like, you know that if I'm having a hard time and I can't see stuff for myself, I call on you. You I'll go and work with other people. Someone catches my eye on social media. I was like, yeah, I'll I'll I'll double into what you have, you know, like full on full disclosure, three hundred and fifty dollars with one guy that's been in this like stuff for like decades. Shittiest thing I've ever had to like.
29:42
And I could have taken that and been like, oh my God, I just wasted $350. Instead, I was just like, okay, look at yourself. Why are you still searching out for this? Did you show up in the right energy with this? Were you just looking for answers or were you looking to work with someone and get yourself right? Another woman I did a session with, she found shame. And I was like, oh my God, how could I not see that?
30:10
Like, looking back, was like, that is so obvious on every single level. And I think I went with the right energy with her to be like, yeah, I can do this. Using your discernment, using your intuition, asking yourself before you step into any type of coaching or reading or anything, what frequency am I showing up with? Do I think this person, do I want this person to do the work for me? Give me the answers.
30:37
Or am I going to lean more into trust, more into surrender, and use this as, just need a little, even for confirmation, right? I just need a little confirmation. I'm on the right track. Yes. And that means that you've done the, you've asked the better questions and that truly is how anybody should be using services like ours. And really understanding that this is not for us to sit and take your power away from you.
31:08
good or bad reading, it should never be about us taking your power away from you. My goal, I know, I can't speak for others. I definitely know some readers out there and some workers out there that are trash pandas and nobody should ever work with them ever again. And because of the very fact that they are not about empowering you, they're about taking away your power. They're about making you dependent on them. And I think that's trash, but.
31:36
You know, if you can't come into this with the idea that you want to be empowered, then these won't work for you. They won't. It won't work because you won't show up for yourself. And that's the basis of it. And that's why doing this in the mundane and checking yourself and just like not constantly, but consistently.
32:05
just being curious of like, hmm, that's interesting. Why do I think that? Why am I feeling that way? And then maybe you'll get led to be like, hey, go seek that help or hey, just fucking sit underneath a tree. Yes. And I would say to like, don't go in with the idea that you're going to hear one thing and that's going to send you off on a trajectory of the rest for the rest of your life.
32:32
Please don't. And if you are in that mindset, please don't waste our time. Our time is valuable. And to come in as a client who is basically like, well, just tell me ABCD and I will go off and that will be my life. No, no. This is not, it's not about that. It should never be about that. That's not helpful to anyone. I don't know of a single individual where that has ever been.
33:03
an appropriate way to go about things and has not been, you know, hurtful in some way. Yeah. You know, well, you need to go in with this idea that you're going to learn more about yourself and that you're going to love more about yourself and you're going to gain more of your power from things like this and that you're going in with it with the idea that you are going to work with somebody like you said, it's about working with. the thing I don't think people realize is that we think everything's fixed here.
33:32
Right. Your path is your path and it's fixed. Someone's told you something, medical doctor. Right. And like, well, I can't do anything about it. I don't want to say that everything's changeable. Like, I am never going to be an opera singer. Like, know that I cannot manifest that. Obviously, things within limits. But here's the thing about readings and like the unseen. It's like the butterfly effect. You make one choice.
34:02
And that person's reading changes because of they didn't see that choice. They didn't see your next five steps. And so you have to understand that, that the information that you're given is like, could affect the way you walk. And, know, like just going back to that, like, well, you have contracts not to have kids, but you can change your contracts. These are the steps.
34:30
Right? So instead of just being like, if someone says, you you're contracted to X, Y and Z. Well, that's not set in stone. You can change that. Right. Right. like even going back, am I going to have a boy or a girl? Like, I believe, like you say, like, there's just souls out there that might like jump in at the like flash of light zinc thing. Or there might be souls at the last minute be like, my turn. No, fuck you. Get out the way. Like barge in.
34:58
Or because as a proud member of the LGBTQ community, one may step in and be like, well, my outside packaging is going to be this, but this is how I'm going to feel most authentically comfortable presenting myself to the world. Exactly. it's hard. There's no judgment here. But when you're told you have a boy, the way your society has imprinted it, you have this is what my boy is going to be like.
35:27
You have a girl. This is what my girl's gonna be like. And you have all these expectations and that could be, I mean, have like, should I get personal? I have an uncle that had a boy and that boy is not the boy he thought he was gonna be. He is a completely different, beautiful, like human soul being that's living, like think fuck, he's living his authentic life and not just trying to show up how his dad thought he was supposed to show up, right? So once again,
35:57
you're projecting these expectations. And that's what I personally feel fuck people up the most. 100%. And I think it's just not fair because people like to sit and have a very 3D understanding of souls. And I think I mentioned this in the spirit baby conversation of you have to understand that we use the term spirit baby. We use the term baby because
36:22
That's a human thing that when they come out, they are dependent on us and they are a baby and they're small. But in reality, their soul is not a baby. Their soul is not small. Their soul is very old, has done other lives the same as you. And while no, I don't think that you should, you know, have a baby and then like just be like, well, you think you're hungry, go make yourself something when they can't even crawl yet. Obviously, but like you have to understand that they too have choice.
36:50
And this is the other thing that I don't think that us coaches talk about enough is especially with fertility. It's not a one way. It's not one way path. Yes, Monica works primarily with women. She has met multiple ways and opportunities to work with a couple, but primarily she tends to work with the women because those are the ones who find her and are having questions and things. But I'm going to be very honest with you, whether you all that your partner is
37:20
just as necessary, just as important, whether you are having a natural birth or doing IVF or doing a surrogate or adopting or whatever, because they too have choice and they too are a part of this journey with you. Do you understand the multitudes, the probably trillions of different future pathways that you could be on because of the variety of different choices y'all are making independently and then together?
37:49
It is insane. And there is not a single person who can give you with any sort of 100 % clarity, a particular thing ever. You have to take that into consideration and honor that and not see that as a disempowering thing, but see that that in and of itself, that there are so many different ways in which you can reach the same goal is empowerment in and of itself. It should not be defeating. Yeah. Yeah.
38:18
I mean, that is a completely different podcast. But put them in too. Right? And we're just not talking about sperm here, people. Like, there is so many other things that... I mean, I've had a few breakthrough sessions where they'll talk to me and then they'll let the secret out about their husband. And I'm like, that's it. It's your husband and your husband's energy and the way you're reacting to the husband. And they're like, really? I'm like, yeah.
38:46
Like, it's not the supplement, it's not the diet. Anyways, Abigail, as always, this has been really helpful. I hope that this has really empowered you guys to make sure when you are seeking out these readings and these amazing gifts that you're showing up in your empowerment and working with the practitioner, not looking for your magic eight ball, because a lot of the time magic eight ball is going to tell you.
39:15
Check again. Look again. The answer is no. All your information and links are going to be down in the show notes until next time, because obviously you're going to be on another time. y'all. Thank you once again for tuning in and becoming the conscious mama you were born to be.
39:40
Remember, I wasn't some magical unicorn who stumbled into fertility success. I stayed consistent. I put in the work and I made it happen. And guess what? You can too. And I have something for my loyal podcast listeners, but here's the key. This is only for women who are feeling burnt out, frustrated, and stuck in the cycle of endless research. And you're at a point where you are screaming, I have tried everything. Why isn't this working?
40:10
This only works for women who are ready to take a radical responsibility for their journey and start listening to their body's innate wisdom. Because deep down, you know you can heal and achieve your ultimate goal. If that's not you yet, that's okay. Not everyone is ready yet to show up with ease, deeply connect to their energy, unlock subconscious patterns, and listen to their body's ability to come into full
40:39
coherence. But for those who are ready, I'm offering something I only do with my paying clients and this is a fertility breakthrough session. This is the first thing I do even before I start really deeply working with someone in a coaching package. It's a deep dive session where we look at exactly where you are right now, what's keeping you stuck, and the easy shifts that can change everything.
41:07
But fair warning, these sessions are very limited and go fast. So if you're interested in checking out my superpower for uncovering exactly what's been overlooked, jump into one of these free calls. They're deep, they're intuitive, and they're game changing. The only way you can access this is if you actually personally message me.
41:30
You can do it on your favorite platform, IG, TikTok, or at my personal email, monica at findingfertility.co, not .com because they wanted $3,000 for the M with just one word. And that word is dreams, obviously D-R-E-A-M-S. And I'll make sure you get that link right away. Remember, this transformation happens when you stay committed to yourself.
41:59
Trust your body, follow your intuition, make it possible. The links that you need are down below. And if you are still here and you absolutely love this podcast, please take some time and leave me a review and help other women like you find this podcast to get the support they need. Help a sister out. Leave a review today.
