One Embryo Left: IVF Transfer Anxiety, Spirit Babies & Letting Go of Fertility Numbers as Destiny

00:00
Hello beautiful and welcome to the Finding Fertility podcast.

00:10
I'm Monica, your mentor in uncovering the hidden layers of your fertility journey. Together, we'll discover the right path for you within the six essential steps to creating the family of your dreams. We'll ditch the overwhelm, tune into your intuition, and build a vibrant foundation for your fertility. Whether it's through gut health, subconscious healing, or energetic alignment, you can unlock your body's natural power to get and stay pregnant.

00:37
Your fertility journey is all about radical responsibility and deeply believing that your body is on your side. It's time to stay consistent, embrace trust, surrender, and create the transformation you deserve. Fighting fertility does not diagnose, prescribe, or treat any fertility issues. What we do is empower you to take control of your health by uncovering the root causes

01:01
holding you back. Let's do this together. Happy Friday, y'all. Welcome back to another episode of Finding Fertility. I'm your host, Monica Cox, and I am completely honored you are here with me, becoming the conscious mama you were born to. Today's episode is a glimpse into the deep, honest work that happens inside the Zoom room, either in one-to-ones or group coaching sessions. You're going to hear a real conversation. I have cut out her voice.

01:30
and deleted any hint into who she is, but it is a real conversation and my level and style of coaching about stress, fear, we're gonna talk about gender story, spirit baby questions, and the hidden emotional patterns that so many of us are carrying without realizing it.

01:57
especially in the moments that feel like the end. Many of us have had that feeling when it comes to having one embryo left or this is my last transfer. I have a deeply personal story of knowing this. I went into my last frozen embryo transfer with the twins and this was going to be it. I felt like

02:22
This was it. I was not going to do any more fertility treatment. I was done. I was very blessed to have a baby going into this. After I miscarried the twins, that didn't make it any easier to feel like that was the end. When I miscarried, I really felt, okay, I have one kid and I'm forever grateful. A little bit sad because I wanted two, maybe three kids. But here we go. Nonetheless, with Hind tight,

02:51
Those are just stories we're making up. Yes, it was true that I wasn't going to do another round of IVF, even in my heart, but like physically and financially, we were done for several different reasons. I didn't have the deep belief yet and the knowledge that fertility is innate because I showed up for myself consistently and I improved my cellular health that I was going to get pregnant and that I in fact was going to have two children.

03:20
I know how it feels in your bones to think this is the end because you have no other evidence. Now, obviously, this should go without saying that if you need fertility treatment, like genuinely need it because of physical issues and genetic issues, then yeah, sometimes it is the end if you are choosing not to move forward with another round of IVF or even IUI. But for the

03:46
Majority of women who do not have the physical issues or genetic issues and are dealing with fertility issues, a cellular health issue. I can, I want to say I can promise you that if you stay committed to your goal of boosting your cellular health, bringing joy, getting rid of the control patterns, releasing emotions,

04:15
All the things that benefit your life as a woman here on earth, because your fertility is innate, I truly think it will happen for you. And I'm not even saying like, maybe it will happen through IVF down the line. You do choose or an opportunity does present its way because you got out of the way of these opportunities and out of control mode for things to happen.

04:42
That's just how the universe works. And for it to work that way, you have to decide, you have to choose for you to get out of your own way, basically. But I'm really hoping a little sneak peek into this insight can really help you shift something inside because you hear your own experience reflected back with love, clarity.

05:06
And honesty, right? I wish I had more brutal honesty in my journey. My journey would have been radically shorter, less dramatic, less expensive. If I had someone in my corner to really believe and feel so deeply in what was true for me, that I just wasn't ready to accept, believe. Sometimes I just have to borrow other people's energy and be like, if she believes in me that much, why am I not believing in me?

05:36
even harder because the truth is it's you. You show up for you. If you can use that energetic belief system of mine for just a little bit until it becomes appear in your heart, then I'm here for it. So I'm hoping this episode will help you not feel so alone if you're in this part of your journey.

05:57
Or maybe before you even get to this part of your journey, if we can learn from other people's mistakes, then we can really notice and tap into feeling that lighter energy releasing when the truth, when we resonate with the truth and claim it for ourselves. Okay, I don't need to learn that lesson physically here on earth. I get it. Someone else did it and I'm going to just bypass that BS.

06:25
and move into that truth that you feel so innate. So when you're listening to this story or you're listening to anything or reading anything and you're just like, oh my God, I feel that in my bones, that is your call. That is your truth. Sometimes you have to live it. Sometimes you need someone else to untangle the story for you because you're so up in your head.

06:49
I absolutely work with people still and I will forever work with people because I know I can get in my own way. And I want to move through this journey just with a little bit more grace, a little bit more faith that I don't have to do it all alone either. I am here as a reflector, as a reminder that your body is uh wired for creation. It is innate.

07:15
And it is really trying to fight for you, even on the days that you completely doubt it and think it's the end. I'm here to cheer you on and say, have those days, have those down days. You'll hear in this podcast about really feeling the emotions instead of trying to stay positive. Absolutely not.

07:38
We are not saying positive if we are feeling like shit. We are going to move through that emotion. We are going to release it and we're going to let it go. We are not going to bury it anymore. Let this conversation speak to the part of you that is ready for peace, clarity, and a new way forward. This is your reminder that healing is possible. Support is available and you never have to walk this path alone.

08:05
And if you are not on the email list, I highly recommend you getting on the email list. This is the only place that you are going to get the links for the special offers that I run of either jumping into dreams, which is the full course with all the Gut Health 101, all the physical stuff, including the diet, rest and recovery, the stress.

08:29
and all of the energetics inside of fertile energetics. Fertile energetics are for those who are good on the physical side. I'm running special offers of group coaching or one-to-one coaching when you jump into one of those containers. If that is something you're interested in, make sure you get on the email list so you know when those offers are open. Okay, so without further to do, let's get to this very special episode today.

08:58
I think what I've discovered in the last few years is that you can be doing everything right on the energetic side of things. But with that radical honesty, if you look back and be like, okay, maybe I did get a little bit stressed out over this, over that. And that could just massively affect your hormones, you know, where you're at. And it's not something to overdiagnose or overthink. People get pregnant all the time with those numbers.

09:27
It's just because we're putting the greatest importance on those numbers right now in our life that we get just caught up with them and that's the destiny and it's not going to work. And that's like going back to that protection too, right? Like we've been really good at protecting ourselves and putting up this front and wall. It just takes time to have that moment and then just go, okay, it's not the destiny. We haven't finally arrived. And leading up to this transfer to if you have decided not to try.

09:56
You can just give yourself a get out of jail free card of just, you know what? It doesn't even matter. I'm about to be taken over with all the hormones. I know I've done my best and this is just where I'm at. And that's such a peaceful place to be if you allow yourself, but.

10:13
Looking back.

10:17
with the eyes I have now.

10:21
It's a story you're telling yourself. You're going to relate to whatever comes your way. You are going to love the hell out of that child. I always knew I was going to be a boy mom. I have a great relationship with my mom, but growing up, it was different. My mom was a lad's lad. She was one of the guys. She ran heavy masculine energy. She was the breadwinner.

10:49
She kept the family together. She had awful relationships with her mom and her sisters. She never had best girlfriends. She had best guy friends. So I therefore took all that and we had awful relationships with girls my whole life. When I started getting into all of this, I subconsciously realized that I thought all women were bitches, including myself. So I had a lot of underlining subconscious beliefs.

11:19
about what women were. And when I started working with my mentor, Tali, at one point she said, oh, I see why you had two boys. You couldn't hold the woman frequency yet. that hindsight now, it was this not only energetic thing that I didn't know I was having, have going on, but telling myself this story about I'm a boy mom, I only want boys. I don't relate to girls. It would have been really hard for me.

11:49
to bring up a girl without this knowledge. So there could be some underlining stories that you have. And with the spirit baby thing, I personally don't believe that if you are fully rejecting a boy, you're not right now, but let's just say you were like, maybe I was with the girls, right? Like I really energetically couldn't bring that frequency in.

12:19
There was still plenty of boys lined up. Or if a girl really wanted to come in and be like, Hey, I'll take you on. Let's go. I'll push you forward. I don't think that your limiting beliefs, the ones that you are having with yourself is going to block whatever gender is behind there. And I deeply believe that because I know you're doing the work.

12:46
already and that conscious soul will be looking at you like, we'll be okay. No matter if it's a boy or a girl, like mom's doing the thing, she's doing the thing. We're going to get, even if you're not perfect, we're going to work through this together. Now this is our soul's journey. I'm going to help her bring out what she really truly wants to.

13:08
be brought out, but you need a little kid to do that. Just like with this journey. Just like with any of these journeys, no matter what you label your journey through your lifetime here in earth, everyone has one. No one gets out of this life cycle without learning a lesson or going through a hero's journey. So I wouldn't overthink that. And I would just play around with what would you be scared of?

13:37
If you had an upthroat, like with radical honest with me, I had a little girl looking back 10 years ago. I will be scared that she would have to go through all the things like I can consciously say now, but I couldn't 10 years ago. I wouldn't know how to love her. I wouldn't know how to bring her up as a woman in her feminine, things like that. I would be scared of the hormonal issues girls have. I was the troublemaker. My brother was super easy. When you have a little boy.

14:07
I can't relate to him. Even that's a fear. You have these stereotypes of what boys are going to be like. Look, I have two very serious voice. They are sports and cars and rough and double. I like that. If you think you're going to bring a little boy that's into that is not true either. Half the boys at my kid's old school aren't into sport. They're into music, dance or art. You will always find something. Maybe play around with what

14:36
scares you the most or why you think you wouldn't have just as fun bringing up a little boy as you. Just be radically honest. No one's going to see it. Write it down. You could do a judge your neighbor worksheet with yourself. Just write it out and start laughing at yourself. Okay, this is ridiculous. Like why am you even in this thought? And also play around with the thought process of this isn't going to be my only child.

15:05
You keep saying, I only have one embryo left. That's just the evidence you have right now. That doesn't mean it's your future. Whether, I don't know, there's so many different scenarios. Like, just be open to this is just the journey, this is just a chapter and we're going to keep going. No matter what happens with this transfer, you're not going to go back to a shitty diet. You're not going to go back to a shitty lifestyle. You've definitely made the decision. I've changed my life for the better. So with that new reality.

15:36
A lot is possible. You can have a boy and a girl. can have two girls. You can have two boys. You can have three. Like, whatever you want. How does that feel? So you put the name and the emotion, but I think you can do it with anything, with any situation. And then check in with your heart's desire, right? So if you have this heart's desire to have a little girl, honor that too. You know, don't shut that down of, should just be happy with what I get.

16:04
You might have that heart's desire because there is a little girl up there calling your name and close to your field. Just honor that and be like, okay, here you are. But once again, let that expectation go. You set the desire, you remake the action, but you let go of any expectation or in this case, it'd be the what, right? Not the how or what it is. You're willing, but you might have.

16:33
that desire because that frequency is coming in strong for you. And there is a little girl. My second son, before I found out it was a son, I had a crazy vivid dream that a little girl came up and was like, hi, mom. For a while I was convinced it was a girl. And then I just knew before we even found out, was like, it's not a girl, it's a boy. I was carrying the exact same wife and it was a boy. I was later told by several people that I had a little girl up there.

17:02
And then at one stage, many children waiting for me. I said, I have many children waiting for me because I have all these women who are looking at me so they can all go to them. And we had a little conversation with the little girl that was waiting for me and just was like, it's not right for our family here on earth. It would have put a lot of strain to have another child. After years of infertility, that was a really hard thing.

17:30
to do to say, okay, now I know I can have whatever I want. But it was just the timing and everything I needed to do for myself. My boys love babies. They're like, mom, have a baby. I'm like, you gonna take care of it? Do you do like spirit baby stuff? Are you interested in that? I question myself too all the time. I think a lot of the time like when you're in the thick of a journey.

17:57
And you're developing your intuition and your discernment in all these layers to it. Connect with the realm. It's definitely next level, not necessary. I've had a few conversations with Abigail on this and I see a lot of people get really hung up with spending their money and spending their time trying to connect with spirit baby. Going back to my deep belief that your fertility is innate.

18:24
And if you actually hyper-focus on the things that bring that innateness connected to the spirit baby, like joy and love and fulfillment in your life, instead of getting hung up, I think people get sidetracked with it. They put so much, while I can't connect, oh, I'm not feeling it. You're once again searching outside of yourself for that feeling. If you just felt it inside of you,

18:51
and you just innately know that's all you need. If you want to have that ability to connect, then that's just practice. There's many times I still sit in freaking silence and nothing comes up. It's just a practice. Even all these gifted people still immensely practice her practice to get to where she is. She still practices. The other thing about Spirit Babies is I've seen multiple times.

19:18
Uh, people be told that their spirit baby is like right there. And because, because maybe they, I don't know many different reasons why, but it seems like the spirit baby's there, but their bullshit's there. And they let the bullshit get in the way of the physical creation of that spirit baby coming in.

19:45
I've talked about the song podcast thing. We had a whole podcast about it where I one lady be told she was contracted not to have kids. And one lady be told that her spirit baby was right there. The way they continue to move forward in their journey was the one who was told that didn't have, was contracted not to have kids, wildly changed her life. She was like, fuck that. I'm going to change my contract. Cause I guess you can.

20:15
Sometimes I'm like, not that I don't believe it's made up, but I think sometimes the spirituality stuff is still bounded by rules, if that makes sense. I think it's limitless, but because our minds need rules and things to see to make sense of it. So anyways, she saved her life because she was going to die in the next 10 years of liver failure. like...

20:44
She radically changed her life. It was so amazing. And then the one who was told your spirit baby's right there, you just have to keep working on these things. She got lost in the bullshit. And I don't know if she has kids either, but like, sometimes I think it's definitely a real thing. I believe people can connect with their spirit babies and then people like Nancy Mae connect with all of them. I don't know if you ever came up with, Elizabeth King doesn't really do much.

21:12
But she was a good friend and a colleague. When I was getting to know her, I asked her once, what's your special gift? And she was a little bit timid of it. Psych and c-spirit babies. was like, ah. But I also think that we can derail from our own joy and sourcing that feeling inside of us when we're, it doesn't guarantee you to show up for yourself if you know that baby's on your doorstep. So let's just believe that baby's on your doorstep and do the work anyways.

21:42
And all they want you to do is figure out the right path on a cellular level, right? Here on Earth, what is your diet? If you're using supplements, what are your exercise things that you need to do that aren't a chore, the diet's not going to set your soul on fire. You get in a rhythm and you're happy with it. You're seeing results, right? And then the only other thing they want is joy, pure joy. You coming back to self-love, self-worth, it's all about you.

22:11
They want that for you because if you have that for you, you're better able to give that and help foster that in them. Right? So right now with my 10 year old, I'm actually doing a lot of subconscious work with him because let's say the first five years of his life, I didn't know any of this. So we were just projecting and bringing in the energetic stuff that we didn't know. And now we see it not only because we're conscious enough to see it, but uh

22:41
He's also presenting in ways that we're just like, where did you get this from? And that's why most parents were just like, I don't understand how this smart boy or girl could be acting this way. They don't want for anything. They have good education. We're supportive, but people just don't know their own bullshit. Yeah. And so now we do some centered around reading for him. He doesn't like reading. He thinks it's not important. It's like the most fresh.

23:11
Anyways, that's why it's all about you. The baby doesn't want anything. It wants the same frequency. so coming home to yourself is the best thing you can do. And that's the hardest thing because you're battling your demons. You're battling the belief system and you're battling the doing. I remember...

23:41
The patterns came back wildly with my second, but even my first, why wasn't it good enough just to keep a human being alive? That's your soul. Let's say the first six months to maybe two years. If you achieve that you kept that human being alive and in firm any, right? You're not screaming the house down. You're not having to lock yourself in a room because you're so pissed off.

24:10
you've achieved, that's it. But the way we're programmed, it doesn't feel like that. We need to make sure the house is perfect, the laundry's done, the dinner's cooked, and maybe we're working part-time from home, doing all these things. And then we wonder why we're so stressed out and not enjoying motherhood or not healthy in our own right.

24:36
The more you can get your nervous system used to feeling safe, motherhood is going to be so blissful for you. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what they want. And if you still want to connect with them, you just take that 20 minutes to get into that meditative state and you can create your own. What I do now is I'll go sit on a park bench and then I'll invite whoever like energy I'm practicing reading or conversation that I want.

25:05
to come and sit on the bench with me and then not judge what shows up. Cause I think that's the hardest part for my brain is that I think it has to happen a certain way. Like it has to look a certain way or feel a certain way. For a long time, I thought my intuition or like inner dialogue, I was like, I'm just talking to myself. I thought it was like, I'm here, God is here talking to him. Exactly. Yeah. So then using your discernment is this, am I, is this the ego? Am I trying to force it?

25:36
But you can set up somewhere where you go and you just sit and you just welcome, okay, who's going to come, what's going to come and then not judge it. And then if nothing comes, you just don't judge yourself. Say, okay, that's just a practice. And, I can't do it. That was a big thing for me. I can't do it. Okay. If I keep telling myself I can't do it, then I'm not going to do it. Your spirit maybe definitely just wants that joy. So what does it look like in the beginning of winter in the UK?

26:06
Going into a transfer, what kind of joy do you think you can bring into your life now? um This is what I said to another client who had a transfer. want you to be like that ultimate observer and get really real with yourself. If you have a day where you are down in the dumps, instead of running away from it and going, I want you to face it. I want you to just sit in it.

26:36
Because what you're then doing is, know, think about as a circle and like all the shits in the circle, right? And you're just holding it in. I just have to stay positive. So the shit's still in the circle. But this is the space where, like, even let's say it's your womb. This is the space where your baby wants to come into. so...

27:01
whether or not that baby comes in, right? Because babies come in all the time in crappy situations. They are going to come into that. So if you are able to open up and release that, you're creating a more harmonious state for that baby to be in and for yourself. So I want you to face what comes up. Even if it's just for 20 minutes, 30 minutes, if you have extra time.

27:27
Like some of that, I don't know if you ever tapped on some of those videos that I sent in the YouTube about the wild dancing. Do that. It's coming up to my dad's anniversary in a few weeks. And so I had my body worker come and she's like, all right, what's going on? I was like, I have so much crazy tension in my hips right now. That's where I store it. So that's where she massively focused on and actually in my shoulders, which I wasn't, I thought it was just.

27:55
sore from the gym, but I think it's the weight of the world on your shoulders. You really get into that body work. The other thing that I have now is a massage gun. I put it on super high and I massage that fascia and tissue and muscle when I have anxiety. So not only am I doing the mental work of what's going on, but I'm also connecting with the body, whether it's like shammatic movement, a massage.

28:20
Just really getting that energy out of your body and not storing it. I wish I knew that I would just face what was coming up. And then other than that, it's really about just bringing in joy, doing that opposite action, right? I remember getting the numbers of how many eggs were collected. I think it must have been that, because we didn't go to a transfer after that. So I think it was the second...

28:50
IVF. And I remember having so much anxiety that day of waiting to get the results. But then we were trying to garden as well. And I just remember going in and out. I would leave my phone in the house. And it's just, if you have one of those days, just keep trying to do the opposite action. Do the release and then get into painting. Go for a walk. Do something that's going to...

29:18
really connect with the joy, get lost in the flow. Try to stay away from doom scrolling and numbness, maybe a bit of Netflix long form content over short form content. And then just keep telling yourself, I've done the best that I can. I truly believe it's written in the stars. There's not a dramatic thing you can do to change the results. Healing does take a certain amount of time.

29:47
in the body, stick with your diet, stay away from things that cause inflammation. Absolutely. That's going to help. But just be really show gratitude to yourself for look how far we've come from where we were and just thank yourself. We did it. This is just chapter. It's not the end. And just give yourself space, which I think you have, which is really, I think you're going to find this full.

30:15
Cause is this going to be the first time you're not really working during? Yeah, it's a game changer because it wasn't until...

30:25
It wasn't until my, my IVF baby, every other transfer or retrieval, I was working. I even, I stayed in York for my, the first time I got pregnant, I stayed in York, but I had just quit my job. And then I stayed for the transfer. And then we drove to Rossnigga, because then we were living in Rossnigga for nine weeks. But it wasn't until my IVF baby that I didn't have a job, that I wasn't moving full time and scheduling.

30:54
20 different things that completely changed the game. And that's why I had a baby. The whole experience was radically different and much more enjoyable. I'm happy for you that you have that space to do it and experience it in a different way instead of juggling behind your balls. Just keep tapping into when things get thick and heavy for you, when emotions and thoughts, even around the sex of the baby.

31:22
And just keep honoring yourself of, I'm going to continue to show up in this work with holding it. It doesn't make or break the journey. If you have a heavy release during transfer, when the baby's back in early pregnancy, that's better than keeping up that high cortisol, keeping up that high stress, keeping up that stuff. uh

31:49
I don't know, I don't have any science or real experience with it, but my belief is that everyone benefits from a release. Because it's first on such an energetic level and then it slowly goes into the physical, it's not like a big heavy blow to the whole system. It's almost like the opposite if like you have a woman who is like constantly eating shit food during her pregnancy, right?

32:15
Like it's just that slow. even if you think about drugs, how many times do people do drugs when they're pregnant? That doesn't affect the pregnancy there and then. It doesn't cause a miscarriage. doesn't cause that, but it's that slow development. Just if you're doing the opposite, these like releases, whether it be a subtle one or maybe you feel it's a big one, it's not going to affect anything. I truly believe the only thing that really affects a pregnancy

32:45
is like a big physical impact if you get into a car accident and you have that like, course that has been affected. But I think everything else is already written in the stars. So many women beat themselves up. I know I had a friend who had early miscarriage and she was late for something and she ran to the appointment. She's, think that's what, you know, it doesn't work that way. Just keep that belief system, whether it's true or not.

33:14
We're all just making up these things anyway. No one can say anything. That helps in every stage of what's going to come up next. I had a really crazy bleed with my second one at nine weeks, like the day after I got a scan with him. I was lucky enough to have my mother-in-law who's an ex-midwife. She's just, it just doesn't work that way. She's like, don't, you won't, the baby was completely healthy the day before.

33:42
You don't just suddenly miscarry like that, a miscarriage would be a lot longer. She gave me that reassurance, like, look, something did happen, but it's not as bad as you think. Luckily, I got to go back into the scan the next day and I, the lady was like, oh, do you know you have a heart shaped uterus? My little one was on one side of my uterus and my lining came away from the other side, but it didn't affect the pregnancy. You're doing good.

34:10
I know it's a lot. agree with you. You don't wish bad on anyone, but what else is going to push you to change? Right? If everything's good and you think everything's good and you just keep going down that rabbit hole, you'll probably see it now in your life. You've changed so much. You look at the world differently and then you'll start seeing other people's patterns.

34:34
The way they speak to themselves, their belief system are the way they be. My mom's dealing with going to funerals every month. And it's like, yeah, get ready because a lot of people your age in the next five to 10 years, if they don't change, they're going to see the outcome of their ways. So yeah, us being older moms, we just benefit from not having that mindset of, I'm old.

35:04
outlast this because we have the knowledge. Make it as simple as you can. You got the tools from the course. It's pretty simple. If you are just that observer of your life and you take a responsibility when needed without judgment and you continuously do that, life changes. So do the best you can in these times because these times are way thicker.

35:32
Other times, and then there'll be other times in your life that will be just as thick and you'll have the tools to get through them. Make it simple. It sounds like you have a great plan with saying at your parents while working and just showing up for yourself, keep that belief that this is not the end. This is not my last embryo. Yep. This is just a process. I have all the working bits. I'm seeing my numbers improve.

36:01
commit to just being like, I'm just going to live my life now. I'm done trying to conceive. I'm going to live my life. know how to walk forward. I know how to improve my cellular health and watch what unfolds with you and drop that expectation to what it has to be yesterday. I haven't reconnected with her and I'm dying to know her story, but I had a woman who

36:29
She was mid forties. I want to say she was like 42. She had a baby already. She had Down syndrome, little girl. And they tried and tried for their second. During our work together, she did two rounds of IVF. They both failed. No embryos. And we became pretty friendly. So we were friends on our personal accounts. And earlier this year, there was a picture of her with her baby boy.

36:59
has two kids now and I did say I would love to hear how it all unfolded, whether you got pregnant naturally or you did another IVF, like whatever it is. But her story to me is just like a testament that if you're willing for it to happen whenever and you give up on those timelines, when you release all the narrative and all the negative emotion around that, you'll never sit there with your baby and go, I wish this happened earlier.

37:27
I just be eternally grateful that this was your time, this was your moment. This is when they wanted to come through. Cause sometimes I've heard that with queer babies is that it's on their timeline, not yours. If you just keep that faith and drop the narrative of I'm trying to conceive, I'm trying to have a baby. So like, I have all the tools now, I'm going to have a baby and I'm willing to just live life until they come. Yeah.

37:54
That's harder, easier said than done. I'm highly confident she can get pregnant naturally, but she keeps spinning those wheels. That is the false surrender that most of us get stuck into. Not meaning that we shouldn't look at those medical procedures and stuff, but just when you're that ultimate observer, it's sometimes good to have references. Okay, am I acting like this? Am I acting like that? It's just observing. Okay.

38:22
There's a lot of things I've done business-wise and I've been there like, why am I here? What am I doing? And it's for me to be the observer of someone else and go, that's not how I want to perform my business. That's not what I want to do. I obviously was led to them for a reason to be in their field and understand their world and then go, it's a solid no. Instead of wondering, should I've done that? Should I've done this? I'm like...

38:52
I'd rather just not have a business than do that type of thing. So it's not, we're not judging people, but we are definitely using them as mirrors and reflecting of, okay, I don't want to sit in that energy. I want to be able to move myself a little bit forward. And that's an ultimate gift you can give yourself, but that's one of my gifts is to be able to see people's stuff. And then I practice the non-judgmental part of it. Okay. We're in there. Journey.

39:21
Okay, thanks for showing me that. That's not how I want to move in my life. I'm going to stay committed. The word discipline has been popping up a lot. And I think sometimes in a health journey, we can look at discipline in a negative way, right? We can get all consumed with it. But if we can look at discipline with a lens of self-love and self-worth,

39:49
I'm going to love myself enough to show up in this radically different way without judgment, without like, why is me? Why do I have to do this type of energy with this? I am so grateful. I have this knowledge to therefore get me to where I want to go. I thought that was really interesting to watch because during this journey, especially when you have your kids, I met a couple that are doing this as well and it's all consuming. Sometimes you can get in that ride of.

40:18
Getting back to that discipline of showing up for yourself in this unique way in these times is an amazing gift to give yourself. Just keep that in mind when you're moving through this, okay, ultimate observer. Yeah, that's probably another piece of advice. Just be graceful to yourself. Just know that it's not you. It's a short period of time. I feel for you. know exactly how you're about to feel.

40:47
And I guess too, with all the work, right? You might not even feel like doing the work and you know what? That's fine too. You just gotta let it be what it is. Don't beat yourself up because you can't actually force yourself to do the work when you have no emotions and hormones. Just be graceful of yourself. It won't be long. Once you start taking the putt dress your own life changes. Okay. Just keep in touch. Let me know what's going on. I'll change the dates and yeah, I'm excited for you.

41:16
Thank you once again for tuning in and becoming the conscious mama you were born to be. Remember, I wasn't some magical unicorn who stumbled into fertility success. I stayed consistent. I put in the work and I made it happen. And guess what? You can too. And I have something for my loyal podcast listeners, but here's the key. This is only for women who are feeling burnt out, frustrated, and stuck in the cycle of endless research. And you're at a point

41:45
where you are screaming, I have tried everything, why isn't this working? This only works for women who are ready to take a radical responsibility for their journey and start listening to their body's innate wisdom because deep down you know you can heal and achieve your ultimate goal. If that's not you yet, that's okay. Not everyone is ready yet to show up with ease.

42:12
deeply connect to their energy, unlock subconscious patterns, and listen to their body's ability to come into full coherence. But for those who are ready, I'm offering something I only do with my paying clients, and this is a fertility breakthrough session. This is the first thing I do, even before I start really deeply working with someone in a coaching package. It's a deep dive session where we look at exactly

42:41
where you are right now, what's keeping you stuck, and the easy shifts that can change everything. But fair warning, these sessions are very limited and go fast. So if you're interested in checking out my superpower for uncovering exactly what's been overlooked, jump into one of these free calls. They're deep, they're intuitive, and they're game changing. The only way you can access this is if you actually personally message me.

43:10
You can do it on your favorite platform, IG, TikTok, or at my personal email, monica at findingfertility.co, not .com because they wanted $3,000 for the M with just one word. And that word is dreams. Obviously D-R-E-A-M-S. And I'll make sure you get that link right away. Remember this transformation happens when you stay committed to yourself.

43:40
Trust your body, follow your intuition, make it possible. The links that you need are down below. And if you are still here and you absolutely love this podcast, please take some time and leave me a review and help other women like you find this podcast to get the support they need. Help a sister out. Leave a review today.