Truth # 10: Finding Comfort in Chaos During Infertility & IVF

Monica is guiding you through a 10-week deep dive into these ten truths, peeling back the layers of chaos with practical tools, empowering insights, and her real-life experiences. Whether you’re feeling stuck in your fertility journey or wrestling with overwhelm and doubt in another area of life, these conversations offer a roadmap to healing and transformation.

The Start: Why Grief Isn’t Failure: The Raw Truth About Infertility and Healing

Truth #10 Comfort in Chaos: The ups and downs of the journey have become her norm. Chaos feels familiar, almost safe. But this comfort is holding her back from stepping into the calm, aligned energy she needs to move forward

The Zoom camera blinked on, and Monica raised an eyebrow the second she saw Mabel’s face.

“You look… weirdly calm. I like it!”

Mabel sighed. “I know. It’s freaking me out.”

Monica chuckled. “Let me guess. No new symptoms, no bloodwork pending, no podcast you’re halfway through about sperm quality or mitochondrial health?”

“Literally nothing. I even checked my inbox twice to make sure I didn’t miss a crisis.”

“Ah yes, the classic ‘I’m addicted to chaos but pretending it’s curiosity’ move.”

Mabel groaned. “Why do I feel like I’m spiraling more now that there’s nothing to spiral about?”

Monica leaned in, her smile fading into something softer. “Because your nervous system has been conditioned to believe chaos equals safety. And now that there’s no fire to put out, you’re panicking because there’s nothing to do.”

Mabel exhaled hard. “It’s like I need a problem to solve or I start crawling out of my skin.”

“You’ve trained your body to associate momentum with survival. Stillness feels unsafe because it’s unfamiliar. But stillness isn’t laziness, Mabel. It’s integration.”

“Okay… but what do I do with this feeling? I feel like I’m malfunctioning.”

Before Monica could answer, Mabel caught movement behind her on the screen.
A familiar smirk appeared just over Monica’s shoulder.

“Monique,” Mabel said flatly, as the woman draped herself dramatically into the frame, chin resting on Monica’s shoulder like she’d always lived there.

“Miss me?” Monique grinned, eyes twinkling. “You were radiating withdrawal symptoms like a chaos junkie on a cleanse. I couldn’t stay away.”

Mabel folded her arms. “Is this going to be helpful, or are you just here to roast me?”

“Both,” Monique said cheerfully. “Let’s get one thing straight. You don’t need to be constantly fixing something to be valuable. Your worth isn’t measured by your productivity or how many protocols you’ve memorized.”

“I know that,” Mabel muttered.

“Do you?” Monique cocked her head. “Then why did you invent a new supplement stack this morning when your current one is working just fine?”

Mabel opened her mouth, then shut it.

Monica stepped in, her tone gentle. “This is the pattern, Mabel. When chaos is your comfort zone, peace feels like withdrawal. Your body’s like, ‘Hey, where’s our usual adrenaline hit? Where’s the cortisol cocktail?’”

“So what do I do now that there’s nothing to fix?”

Monique and Monica, shockingly, answered in unison:
“Receive.”

Monique smirked. “Congratulations, babe. You’ve officially leveled up to the phase where your job is to let good things in without scrambling to earn them.”

Mabel blinked. “That sounds… fake.”

“It’s not fake,” Monica said. “It’s just foreign. But only because you’ve lived in a world that told you worth is earned through effort, not ease.”

“Your system thinks peace means danger,” Monique added. “So now? We rewire that.”

“How?” Mabel asked. “Like… practically?”

Monica smiled. “Start small. Wake up and don’t immediately look for something to fix. Let your morning be quiet. Let your body speak before your to-do list does.”

Monique chimed in. “And next time you feel that itch to create a new problem? Sit your ass down. Put your hand on your chest and say, ‘I’m safe even when there’s nothing to fix.’ Repeat as needed.”

Mabel laughed through her exhale. “You two are terrifyingly aligned.”

“We’re you,” Monica said simply. “Just two sides of the same nervous system. One that’s finally learning what it feels like to rest without guilt.”

Mabel nodded slowly. “Okay. So today… I don’t fix. I don’t chase. I just… receive.”

Monique raised a brow. “Look at you, getting all energetically mature and shit.”

Monica smiled. “You’re doing it, Mabel. You’re finally creating a life your baby will feel safe landing in.”

And this time, Mabel believed her.

Monica tilted her head, her voice softening. “Before we go, you know what I always ask…”

Mabel nodded. “The heaviest thing on my heart.”

“The first thing that comes to mind,” Monica added. “No filtering.”

Mabel paused. Her eyes flicked upward like she was scanning the ceiling for permission.

“My dad,” she whispered. “Not even something specific. Just… him. The way I still carry the weight of his disapproval. Like if he doesn’t think I’m doing enough, then I must not be.”

Monique, still leaning on Monica’s shoulder, snorted. “Classic. The Original Inner Critic.”

Monica stayed steady. “That’s the imprint. And it’s not yours to carry anymore.”

Mabel blinked, the tears coming fast and soft. “I thought I’d already let this go.”

“You did,” Monica said. “And now you’re letting it go deeper. The emotion has moved, but the frequency you're still living in? That’s what we shift next.”

Monique stood upright and gave a little stretch. “Ready to clear this shit or what?”

Mabel smiled through the tears. “Let’s do it.”

And just like that, the session dropped into a deeper layer.
From spiraling to stillness.
From inherited weight to energetic release.
From chaos to trust.

Monica closed her eyes for a moment, tuning in to Mabel’s field.
“Okay. Let’s start where it lives.”

“Chest,” Mabel said, without hesitation. “It feels like a clamp. Like I can’t fully breathe when I think of him.”

Monica nodded. “That’s your heart field reacting. It’s not just the memory—it’s the meaning. The belief. The emotional charge may be softening, but the frequency is still wired into your system.”

Monique stepped closer, voice steady. “You’ve been living in this for so long, it started to feel like you. But it’s not. It’s a vibration stuck on repeat.”

Monica lowered her voice. “So now we shift the signal. Not just what you feel... but what you transmit.”

She placed a hand on her own chest and mirrored the breath she wanted Mabel to follow.
Slow, intentional, through the nose.

Mabel closed her eyes and followed.

As she held the memory in mind, Monica guided her into a full-body release, activating the whole brain state.

“Let your body speak. Let the tears come. You’re not just crying for now. You’re crying for eight-year-old you, who never felt safe unless she was perfect.”

Tears slid down Mabel’s face. She exhaled hard.

There it is, Monica thought. The origin imprint.

Monique stepped forward, her voice quieter now. She gently placed a hand on Mabel’s shoulder.
“Now tell her—little you—what she never got to hear.”

Mabel spoke through some invisible portal, the words landing like truth.
“You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to try so hard. You are already loved.”

And then she felt it.

The heavy, thick cloud of her dad’s quiet disapproval—all the if I’m not doing enough, I must not be enough—leaving her body.
It moved out in a dark wave.
Black. Dense. All-consuming.
And then... gone.

Monica felt the shift first, then saw it on Mabel’s face.

She leaned in. “Good. Now breathe in that new energy coming your way.”

Mabel saw it before she felt it.
A soft, baby pink glow with a shimmer of light.
Not rushing in.
Just arriving.
Wrapping itself around her like a long, slow hug.
The kind her grandma used to give.

They sat in silence for a moment.

Then Mabel opened her eyes.
They sparkled behind the tears that had fallen.

Monica tilted her head. “What’s the frequency now?”

Mabel smiled faintly. “It feels… steady. Like peace, but deeper. Like my whole system finally took a breath.”

Monica nodded. “Exactly. Emotion is what you feel in the moment. Frequency is the pattern your system holds beneath it. You just dropped into a new baseline.”

Mabel placed a hand on her chest. “It feels clear. Open. Like there’s space where the pressure used to be.”

“And what’s the signal your body’s broadcasting now?” Monica asked.

Mabel took a slow breath. “I’m safe. Even when there’s nothing to prove.”

Monique gave her a slow clap. “That’s some healed woman frequency right there.”

Mabel let out a quiet laugh, the lightness real. “It’s wild. That clamp in my chest? Gone.”

Monica smiled. “That’s coherence. Not just aligned thoughts and emotions—but a body that’s finally humming at a frequency that matches the life you want to live.”

Monique winked. “Now go let that baby know the portal is clear.”

Mabel sat with their words, letting them land. Not just in her mind, but in her body. In her breath. In the space that had always been filled with striving.

For the first time in a long time, she didn’t feel the need to do something with what she just experienced. She just let it settle.

“I always thought healing would feel like fireworks,” she said quietly. “But this… this feels like someone finally turned the noise off.”

Monica smiled. “That’s integration. It’s not loud. It’s honest.”

Monique stretched her arms above her head. “And just like that, you’ve exited the hustle vortex. Welcome to the land of clarity and boundaries.”

Mabel laughed. “Does it come with snacks?”

“It comes with discernment and naps,” Monique shot back. “Same thing.”

Monica reached for her tea. “Let this be enough for today. You don’t need to go prove anything just because you feel clear. The shift already happened.”

Mabel nodded, still surprised at the stillness inside her.

But later that day, without pressure, without urgency, she found herself doing something she hadn’t been able to do for months.

She logged out of her fertility forums.
She canceled the subscription for the tracking app she hadn’t opened in weeks.
She even emailed the functional doctor who had her on a never-ending protocol and said,
“Thank you, but I’m stepping away for now. My body knows what it’s doing.”

And when she turned off her phone, she didn’t feel fear.

She felt… free.

And in that quiet, her hand rested on her belly.
Not in desperation. Not in longing. But in trust.

“I’m ready when you are,” she whispered. “And this time, I actually mean it.”

Subject: Keep Going, Mabel – This Is Where the Real Shift Happens

Hello Mabel,

I just wanted to take a moment to reflect on what happened yesterday. That was big.

You let something deep go. Not in theory. Not in your head. But in your body. I hope you really take that in, because this is what it means to reshape your nervous system, your emotions, your frequency, and your reality.

But here’s the truth most people miss:

The real work doesn’t happen in a breakthrough moment.
It happens the day after.
And the day after that.
And in the hundred tiny moments where your brain wants to crawl back to chaos, simply because stillness still feels unfamiliar.

This next phase is about radical honesty.
It’s about catching yourself when you’re about to spiral, not with shame, but with compassion.
It’s about recognizing when you’re “doing” just to feel safe again, and choosing instead to stay in the stillness.
It’s about remembering that the shift isn’t over. You’re living it now.

So keep practicing what you already know.

Go back into your course. Revisit the Radical Responsibility + Embodied Action section.
Not because you need more information, but because you are becoming a master at being energetically, emotionally, and physically coherent.
That section will help you apply what you’ve learned. It’s about moving from knowing to living.

Stay in the cabin.
Keep the fire burning with simple, consistent microsteps.

You are not required to be perfect.
But you do need to stay honest.
You do need to keep choosing yourself, especially when it’s inconvenient or unfamiliar.

Every moment you pause before reacting.
Every time you breathe instead of rushing.
Every time you choose rest over another protocol.

That’s when your new reality takes shape.

And Mabel, you are already doing it.

We're Doing This Together 💚

Monica

Listen to the Podcast: Out This Friday 

Truth #9: Scattered Priorities

Truth #8: Refusing to Slow Down

Truth #7: From Overthinking to Inner Knowing

Truth # 6: Attachment to Old Identities

Truth # 5: Fear of Success

Truth # 4: Mabel's Buried Emotional Baggage

Truth # 3: Mable's Hustle Trap: Put the To-Do List Down

Truth # 2: Overthinking, Worry & Fear: How Mabel Found Peace in Her Thoughts

Truth # 1: The Illusion of Control

Grieving Together: 10 Things Monica Sees in Mabel’s Journey That Are Causing Unnecessary Chaos

Listen up, lovelies: Everything I share about health, diet, or fertility magic is my opinion. Yep, it’s all based on years of trial and error, study, reading, listening, and side-eyeing the nonsense out there. What worked for me might be a jackpot for you—or it might be a total flop. Bodies are weird like that. 🤷‍♀️

Let’s get one thing straight: I’m not a doctor, nutritionist, dietitian, or any other kind of licensed health wizard. If you need medical advice, run—don’t walk—to an actual qualified professional. Don’t come back here saying Monique told you to eat kale for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, okay?

As for the products I mention, they’re either what I used during my own infertility rollercoaster or what I wish I’d known about back then. No guarantees, no promises, and absolutely no refunds on your hope budget if it doesn’t work out.

Now that we’ve cleared that up, proceed with curiosity and, above all, discernment. You’ve got this. 💪✨

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